I know I have a lot to catch up on regarding the boys and our adoption process. For now, some thoughts that have been swarming my head all day.
We have spent the last 18 months researching agencies, asking questions and filling out paperwork. The agency was picked and our home study has been approved. Now, comes a part that people didn't really tell us about: THE WAIT. We aren't naive, we understand that there was going to be a period when we needed to wait for a birth mother to pick our family. However, it was never spoken at how "empty" that period is.
Chris and I are such "doers", just waiting is quite a change and a completely new discipline. There is no more paperwork to fill out, no more research to do, no more choices to be made. I have scanned online to try to figure out what adoptive families do doing this time and there really isn't much out there about it.
Once again, there is a lot regarding international adoption and waiting for the referral, but when it comes to domestic adoption, I have only be successful at finding a couple of articles. There is the typical: prepare the nursery, take parenting class (for new parents), read parenting books, register at baby stores.......that just doesn't "do it" for me.
It has only been 3 months of waiting (even though our hearts have been waiting for quite a bit longer). I understand that to some that have gone through this process that isn't much time at all. However, that doesn't change the feeling.
We are inundated with questions of: "Any news? How much longer do you have? Is the baby here yet? Are you matched yet?" I have already grown tired and leery of those questions. No matter how many times I say that we have no clue about anything, people don't seem to take that statement literally. No clue means just that, NO CLUE!!! No idea of the sex, race, due date, time left, open or closed adoption, local or from another state.....the list goes on and on. I find that I often need to remind myself that people are excited for us and happy for us to grow our family. Just like us, there is nothing they can do but wait and pray for good news.
Maybe when this is all over, I will have some tips for future adoptive parents on how to cope with this stage of the process. For now, we will continue to pray. Pray for guidance, patience. Pray for our unborn child's safety. Pray for the birth mother and for her to have courage and strength to see the pregnancy through. Pray for our boys. That they will thrive with the changes that are to come from all of this. Pray for God's will to be done.
